Raptor report 2/26

0

rr3

Annalisa Klein| Commentary Editor

-We all know Lance Armstrong is in trouble but did you know he might have to pay the federal government around 100 million dollars. Why? He doped and lied about it. Armstrong cycled for the United States Postal Service…poor USPS. They just can’t seem to catch a break!

-Speaking of going Postal…oh weren’t we? Any who, guess who won’t be delivering on Saturdays? If you assumed Gmail, you are completely…incorrect. Eww. What’s wrong with you? It’s obviously our good ol’ outdated post office. Through snow and sleet, my ass.

-261 is a random number. It also might be the number of miles per gallon a new Lamborghini looking Volkswagon might have. I would only have to fill up once every few months! I would no longer have an excuse to not pick up my friends. Damn you, Volkswagon!

-You know what Sony? I hate you. No, I do. I just bought a PS3 and I loved it but it’s black and they came out with a new white one. Right after the white one was released, they announced the PS4. What the freak?! Now I have to buy a new one because I’m a mindless consumer. You’re just as bad as Apple.

– For all you old school porn lovers (you know who you are,) Ron Jeremy is healthy enough to get down and disgustingly gross again. Rejoice! You get to see something I would pay to never see.  Didn’t his “thing” fall off yet?

-Harlem Shake…I don’t get it. Is it for people who just don’t know how to “shake their tail feather?” Shaking my head at all you who participated this past weekend at the Harlem Shake party somewhere near campus but I do wish you internet fame. Rutgers Camden on the map? Hell yeah.

-Guns are flying off the shelves due to the fear of the repeal or alteration of the second amendment. With all of the debate on what is to happen, what is either side accomplishing? No answer seems to be in sight for gun control. I’m losing my faith in the effectiveness of our lawmakers. Not cool.

 

 

 

Share.

About Author

Leave A Reply