Raptor Report [Week of 4/1/2012]

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Senator Lautenberg is calling for a federal investigation into the Rutgers-Rowan Merger. We all know Crispy Christie is shivering in his shoes right now. A girl can dream right? Here’s hoping that an 88 year old man will stand up to this bully on all of our behalves.
+88 years. Here’s looking at you, Frank.

 

Marching for justice. It seems like we have found what we need to fight for in our generation and it seems oddly similar to the 1960’s. The lack of justice for Trayvon seems to be highlighting an ongoing battle for true equality between races.
-1960 because these marches remind us of those.

 

It’s been a BAAAAAAD day for sheep farmers in the United Kingdom. Government ordered sheep dip has been causing permanent health damage to the hard-working farmers of the UK. So for all you fans of lamb at Easter Dinner…I think I’ll pass.
-1 rack of lamb

 

Google has been making moves. They have just majorly launched Google Play. It’s basically an iTunes for Android. With as rocky as Google’s recent adventures have been, (when was the last time you G+’d something?) we’ll see just how well this all works out.
+1 for attempting innovation

Republicans, I need an atlas just to figure out what the hell you guys are doing! Who’s winning? Who’s losing? Does it matter? At this point, I’ve stopped caring about your ridiculous shenanigan of a presidential nominee. Way to dig your entire party into a pothole bigger than the ones off of RT 30 (Those are HUGE!) and into despair.
+another 4 years for Obamarama

 

In the world outside of Rutgers-Camden there is a man. His name is Dean Karnazes and it has been determined that he can run forever. He has run across the United States in 75 days and didn’t have to stop. If that’s not the most insane thing I’ve ever heard, I don’t know what is. According to doctors, he can run 6 miles an hour forever with no negative health effects. Crazy!
+26 miles in a marathon

 

Last Week: 90 – a bag o’ Skittles
This Week: -1842 (THAT’S DEPRESSING!!!)

Last week was a boring week. Let’s spruce it up. Do something crazy and you might make the paper.

 

THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THE RAPTOR REPORT ARE THOSE OF THE COMMENTARY EDITOR AND DO NOT REFLECT THE OPINIONS OF THE GLEANER OR OF RUTGERS UNIVERSITY.

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